Ok, so maybe I was a little off-base with my rant on Shark Week in the last Musings post. Why the sudden change of heart you ask? Well, I caught a show about crocodiles on Animal Planet on Tuesday night and they had a story about some kid swimming when a croc bit off his arm. That was kind of sad and disturbing and it also taught me a lesson that I will never again swim in a swamp. Anyway, they ended up killing the croc that took little Johnny’s (can’t remember his name, so we are sticking with Johnny) arm off and they actually showed footage of the authorities pulling out Johnny’s ARM from the croc! His actual arm, in the croc’s gut, they pulled it out for everyone to see. No warning, no “hey, we are about to show you some sick, twisted stuff, make sure you turn your head for a good two minutes.” Nope, nothing like that at all. And it was gruesome. I’m getting a little nauseated just thinking about it (it could also be the eggs and shrimp I had last night at 11:30p, I’m not a doctor, so I can’t say for sure). Wow, just wow. So, Animal Planet, you are a sick F.

- This one is for all of you ladies out there. Diane Keaton will star in an HBO series as a feminist icon who attempts to reignite the movement by starting a sexually explicit magazine for women. (Thanks Hollywood Reporter for that sentence). A few years ago, John and I had talked about starting our own sexually explicit magazine just for women, but we could never get the investors so we decided to go the blog route. I still say that was a mistake.

- Here is a link to the trailer of Tron Legacy for all of you nerds out there.

- If you ever need a quick drawing of Morgan Freeman and Tim Robbins…this is the artist you should call.

- Sarah Palin’s speech read by William Shatner.

- These guys are excited about Project Runway.

RN

Shark Week is airing next week on Discovery Channel. I tuned in one year because #1. Sharks are cool and #2. A week full of sharks on tv is an awesome idea. But, I came away pretty disappointed. The stuff that I watched had way too many cheesy reenactments and they even threw in the ol’ “look at our awesome technology, we are going to show you a computer generated shark and show you all of it’s glorious movements”…which is cool, except you could actually show me some real footage of sharks, which would be cooler. Way cooler.

So this is what I’d like to see from Discovery Channel next week: I want to see blood. Lots of it. They should pay some guy a million dollars and have him swim a mile in treacherous, great white shark infested water (Preferably they can do this off the Australian coast and have it narrated by some Australian guy. It sounds more legit coming from someone with an accent). Let’s see if the sharks try to attack him…wouldn’t you want to see that? And then if they don’t, let’s prick him with a needle, make him bleed just ever so slightly (sharks have a keen sense of smell. For blood that is)…how long will it take for the sharks to take a nibble? 2 minutes? 5 minutes? 30 minutes? I have no idea, but I’m telling you I’d tune in. And so would you. And then I want a three hour montage of the shark’s “greatest hits.” It just shows sharks attacking seals, fish, and polar bears (yes, eating polar bears is a staple of a shark’s diet)…wouldn’t that be fun? Instead, Discovery Channel drones on and on about how bees kill more humans than sharks. Blah, blah, blah. Let’s show sharks the way most people view them, them: as blood-thirsty creatures who amuse themselves by killing precious little animals and humans.

- Funny interview with Sacha Baron Cohen and David Letterman about a scene involving terrorists in the new movie Bruno.

- The SNL skit, MacGruber is getting close to being made into a full length movie. Val Kilmer and Ryan Phillippe are in negotiations to star. I don’t really find the skit all that funny…but I do like Kilmer a lot, so maybe it’ll be ok.

- There seems to be a salary dispute for a few of the ladies from hit show The Real Housewives of NY. As long as the crazy one (Kelly, I’m looking in your direction) comes back, I’ll be ok.

- Have you ever wondered what an assistant like Lloyd from Entourage makes in a year? It’s depressing. And factor in that they live in either LA or NY.

RN

For some reason I just thought of play-doh so I did some youtubing to find something cool and sure enough, I found some artist guy who sculpts heads out of play-doh. Sure, this guy has a crazed look to him but what do you expect from an artist that works with play-doh?

- There has been a dramatic drop in the number of films shooting in LA but this is an interesting article on the filming of The Soloist and the delicate nature of how that they filmed real-life homeless people in the Skid Row area of downtown LA.

- Michael Jackson is going to pull a Tupac. AEG Live, the company producing Jackson’s concert tour has over 100 hours of rehearsal footage and supposedly they have enough audio to fill two live albums worth of material.

- If you’ve seen the new issue of GQ, then you’ve probably seen the pictures of Sacha Baron Cohen dressed up as Bruno “playing” around with some high school football players. The pictures are hilarious but the principal of the school doesn’t think it’s so funny. Maybe he was just jealous that he wasn’t involved in the shoot.

- Just a funny yet strangely sad story about Elvis Grbac and being People’s Sexiest Athlete in 1998. Note: The same thing happened when Dawn gave me a trophy for Best Boyfriend in 2007 (and no, I’m not making that up.)…at the time, she meant to get it for her other boyfriend Ramon, (suck it Ramon) but she totally mixed it up so I ended up getting it. And you know what? I was just happy to receive an award no matter what the circumstances.

RN

What the F is going on with these celebrity deaths? First, Ed McMahon, then Farrah, then Michael, and now Billy Mays? Unbelievable. What’s strange about Billy is that his career was really starting to take off. He has recently starred in some commercials for ESPN that mocks his tv infomercial persona and then he was in this show called Pitchmen for Discovery. Just sad. I will always miss his big intro for each product that he was pitching, “Billy Mays here for” and fill in the prodcut name…just too funny. Anyway, above is a little youtube tribute to the man. RIP Billy Mays.

- I watched the pilot of HBO’s Hung on Sunday night with my mom and lady. It was the first movie/show that I can remember watching with my mom and feeling a bit uncomfortable…mainly due to the whole “hung” aspect of the show. With that said, my mom thought it was a bit boring, she even fell asleep for a minute or two during the show, but of of course it wasn’t during the sex scenes, that we had to watch together. Nothing like mom/son bonding. Dawn wasn’t a huge fan of the show. I’m more in the “I’m going to check it out again” camp. It wasn’t great, but it wasn’t bad. Pilots are hardly ever that great. But it was a ratings hit with viewers.

- In other HBO news, a trailer (thanks to my co-host John for the link) is finally out for the new show Bored to Death, which premieres in Septemeber and stars Jason Schwartzman as a writer/wanna-be detective. Hmm, I don’t know, the plot is intriguing and it looks like it has a great cast, Ted Danson and Zack Galifianakis (who is now a pretty big star) but I have some reservations about the show at least based on the trailer. I just hope it’s not one of those shows that tries to be too quirky for it’s own good.

- If you don’t have HDNet Movies, I highly recommend you look into getting it added to your cable package. It’s quickly becoming one of my favorite channels. What’s great about HDNet Movies is that once a month, it will premiere an Indie film a few days before it’s released in theaters…pretty ingenious I think. Last month I watched The Girlfriend Experience and in July, the channel will be airing The Answer Man with Jeff Daniels. I feel like Mark Cuban (owner of HDNet and HDNet Movies) should throw a few bones to popcoast2coast for that little endorsement, I just delivered at least one new customer (thanks Aunt CC) to Mr. Cuban. Just trying to follow in Billy Mays’ footsteps.

RN

I promised myself I wouldn’t watch The Real Housewives of New Jersey. This just in, I don’t keep promises to myself. That trip to the dentist that I promised myself three years ago, still hasn’t happened. Anyway, I got sucked into the lives of the funny talking ladies from New Jersey. They own warehouses, they like to pay for expensive things with crisp hundred dollar bills, and the most important thing to them? It’s protecting their “family” if you catch my drift. Anyway, I’m proud to call The Real Housewives of New Jersey, my favorite housewives show. And that’s saying a lot. Also, just for fun, the ladies from the show are now doing commercials for their local grocer.

- I like kids. Wait, let me rephrase that. Kids like me. Ok, one more time, you’ve seen kids before right? What about kids with instruments? What about kids that play the blues like nobody’s business (and click here too for another page)? Thanks Meigan P. for the link.

- That Brad Pitt/Steve Soderbergh film based on the Michael Lewis book Moneyball won’t be coming to a theater near you anymore.

- Jon and Kate + 8 had record ratings on Monday after they announced that they were getting a divorce. Also of note, did you check out Jon’s new cliched single look? Really, did he have to go the earring route now that he’s a single guy?

- I’m sure you’ve heard about it already but Columbia Pictures is in talks with David Fincher to direct The Social Network, which is based on the creation of Facebook. I don’t get this at all. Unless the creator of Facebook was some sort of super spy in his younger days, I don’t get the appeal of the movie at all. And shouldn’t there be an age restriction on Facebook? Is 60 to old to have a page? There needs to be some groundrules set.

RN

I think of a movie. You try to guess it in the comments section. If there are no correct guesses, I’ll update the post with a clue. As always, the above picture is a hint.

UPDATE: Jill…you have guessed the movie! The correct answer was the 1989 movie, Steel Magnolias, starring Julia Roberts, Dolly Parton, Sally Field, and Shirley MacLaine. I never saw the whole thing but I do know that a beauty shop does play a role in it. I think Dolly’s character owns the shop? Anyway, Congratulations Jill, you are the big winner this week.

Good luck!

RN

Saw Away We Go last night and I was not impressed. There were a few funny parts but overall, the film just seemed to wander a bit without making much of an emotional impact. It felt very much like a play, very dialogue driven with hardly little action. And, at the end of it, I’m not sure what, if anything, I learned. But, then again, I have a learning disability. So, that could have played a part in it.

- Awesome street-art but this guy might have to pay for it in jail. And that’s where these street artists belong! I hope this guy rots in prison for the rest of his life for manipulating those orange barrels. Nobody messes with barrels in North Carolina and lives to tell about it.

- Have you heard Lance Armstrong’s story before? Had cancer, fought it, beat it, then won the Tour De France like 7 times. I’m guessing you probably haven’t had enough Lance in your life so the good folks at Columbia have decided to greenlight a Lance Armstrong biopic. And Matt Damon’s name has been thrown around to play Armstrong. I for one will not be seeing this movie.

- Don’t like kids? Or, you like kids but think they can be jerkfaces sometimes? Well, this site might be for you.

- A little inside dirt on the genesis of The Hangover.

RN

I turned old yesterday. I gave the show 48 Hours Mystery a season pass on my DVR. The show has it all. Murder. Over-dramatic hosts. Cool show titles (Lady in the Harbor anyone?). And did I mention they are all true stories? Yeah, count me in! I know this isn’t a very nice thought, but I can’t help but think how idiotic most of these folks are when they commit murder. For instance, there have been a number of shows where the killer actually googles stuff like “How to kill someone and get away with it” on his computer. I mean, really? On your home computer? How dumb are you? Actually, now that I think about it, I shouldn’t have even written that on the blog. If someone comes up missing, I know they are going to start to look directly at this post. This is evidence against me….god, I’m so stupid. I’m no better than those criminals on 48 Hours Mystery.

- You like movies? What about games? Do you like games? Combine the two and click on this link to play. Thanks to my cohost for passing this along.

- Poor review of Nurse Jackie, the new Showtime show starring Edie Falco. I feel like Showtime is HBO geared towards women. Lots of female driven shows…with Weeds being my favorite of the bunch.

- You better start tricking out your van now. Because Liam Neeson is in talks to play Col. John “Hannibal” Smith in the new A-Team movie. Who should play B.A.? I’m thinking Mr. T should just reprise his role, it’s not like he’s doing anything else. And plus, who could actually pull that role off? Maybe Robert Downey Jr?

- Did you see Zack Morris visit Jimmy Fallon’s show last night? I think you should watch it, it’ll be good for you.

Here is an idea for American Idol. Next year, can they just allow people over the age of 65 to compete on the show? I’d probably watch that instead of watching some high school musical nerds attempt to sing. And these oldies could sing songs from Count Bassie and Ella Fitzgerald’s collection. Wouldn’t that be more enjoyable?

- Good review of Heath Ledger’s last film, The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus. I had to spell check that one twice. I like the director Terry Gilliam a lot…his films usually fail to capture the average joe movie goer but I think this particular film will do quite well, seeing that it’s Ledger’s final performance. Also, if you haven’t seen Gilliam’s The Fisher King or Time Bandits, I highly recommend them. They are filled with a lot of fantastical elements.

- I know we have video on demand here but I really like this idea that an Italian broadcaster came up with. It’s basically pay-per-view but not just for the big boxing or wrestling match but for actual shows. I bet you’d think twice about watching I Love Money 2 if you had to pay for it.

- A little youtube clip of Disney animation and how they seem to use the same animation over and over. Thanks to Evan for that clip.

- True Blood‘s second season will premiere on June 14th at 9pm. I’m excited to see Sookie and the gang again.

RN

- This woman didn’t like her high school years. So, for her ten year reunion, she decided to send a stripper to pretend to be her and see what kind of reaction she would get. Stop the presses! Someone didn’t have a good high school experience?! Look, I wasn’t a fan of high school, but is there a real need to send someone pretending to be you to your reunion? Is that how you get back at people? This is just a sad cry for attention. You know what normal people do who despised their high school years when they get their ten year reunion invitation? They show up in a limo, hire someone to be their date, pretend to be wildly successful, get completely trashed, and walk out of there knowing that they have to do the same thing in another ten years. (watch the youtube video here.)

- Looks as if My Name Is Earl has finally run it’s course. This was one of the funniest pilots that I had ever seen. But, it’s the same show every episode…it just got too repetitive. Anyway, Jason Lee is excellent and I’m sure he’ll get back to making some movies.

- Not all twittering is good. You can check out the bad side of twittering here. (Thanks to Melissa L. for the link)

- Inglorious Basterds premiered at the Cannes (pronounced Cannes) Film Festival. The reviews? Um, not so good. And that stinks. Hopefully, these critics are stupid.

RN